A recap of my February Sipping & Sharing Sessions with some Bridal Babes

Every Wednesday at 7:30pm, I pour myself a glass of wine and head over to my Instagram Stories ready to answer all your Wedding Questions… here’s my usual Monthly Round-Up of everything that was asked and answered in the month of February:

Wednesday 3rd February 2021 

Ask me anything at all…

• A Wedding question you’ve been dying to ask? 
• Or just something nosey about myself? 

Q. What was your first dance song? 

1. It was Jason Derulo ‘Marry Me’. Hubby wanted something upbeat so we could really dance together. We gave the guests Gold Confetti Poppers… it made for some amazing photos! My Mum & Dad (divorced), and my Husband’s Mum & Dad joined us on the dance-floor for the final part of the song. Just before our First Dance we cut our cake to Ed Sheeran’s – Perfect (what can I say, it was the wedding song of the year!). A shoved the cake right in Dale’s mouth, haha. I still dream about my Wedding Cake! 

Q. Just started following your page as recently got engaged and love all the tips thank you x (I’ll ask loads of Q’s in the future but just enjoying my engagement first as that’s your Step One! xx

A. Love getting messages like this! Don’t mind me… I’m just doing a little happy dance around my Living Room! PROUD OF YOU!!! & Thank you for following the steps! It’s a magical time… you enjoy lovely! 

Q. What is your favourite wedding breakfast (apart from your own). 

A. Well, we had a BBQ for our Wedding Breakfast… I only remember eating about 10 bites of food all day… but what I had was AMAZING! I love Tuscan style Wedding Breakfasts… or something completely different, like a Grazing Table… I did this one for my daughter’s 1st birthday and it took me sooo long, but it was so worth it! For me, a Hog Roast & Chips or Pizza Van in the evening is just perfect! 

Q. Not a question just a thank you for your MOH/bridesmaid blog! 

A. You are so welcome my lovely! You ask and I shall deliver! Plus, I’m always happy to share photos of my girls, didn’t they just look stunning! Any other specific blogs you want written, just let me know! 

Q. When do you think it’s acceptable to be given an eternity ring haha

1. Ermmm… I want to say IMMEDIATELY cause I want one now (just dropping this here is case Mr T is watching this). But they’re usually given to celebrate a special milestone… maybe an anniversary? The birth of your baby? Traditionally Diamonds are 60th Anniversary material… but I’m definitely not waiting that long! I’ll give him 6 max… seeing as I’ve already had the baby!

Q. What if my other half proposes and I don’t like the ring? 

1. Oh dear! Not the best situation to be in… especially when EVERYONE wants to see your ring as soon as you say you’re engaged! Okay… I think you have 3 options here: 

– Either… be totally straightforward and have a conversation about it… (you have to be brave if you really hate it… you’ll have to wear it every day forever!) Be kind and say you appreciate how much effort he put into it and hopefully he’ll understand! 

– Live with it… if you don’t want to hurt his feelings and are too afraid to say… learn to love it (give it a day or two, maybe it’s just the shock and it’s because it’s not what you pictured… our tastes change all the time. You may grow to love it!)

– Alter it… if you want to keep the ring he chose for you because of the sentiment, take it to a jeweller and see if there is anything you can do to have it altered and make it more your style – that way it should keep you both happy! 

Good Luck!

Q. Show us more of your Wedding pls… it looks stunning!

1. Thank you so much! I’m busy working on a Full Wedding Profile of Our Day… it’s taking FOREVER though… I’m trying to capture every single detail! I promise I’ll share all the details soon! Thank you for asking to see it! 

I’m also doing a full piece on our Honeymoon travels… 11 countries in 14 days! (Just in case anyone needs any inspo for their travels!). It was our Honeymoon that made the ‘Mrs T’ hat ‘famous’ back home! And it’s the image I use for all my pages – I’ve definitely had my money’s worth out of it! 

Q. Now I’ve seen your bridesmaid dresses and flowers wow I want to see more x 

A. I’ll leave you with this little sneak peek at our venue…

Wednesday 10th February 2021 

Q. How far in advance should you send out your invites? 

A. HI LOVELY, WELL… I WOULD ADVISE TO SEND YOUR INVITES AROUND 6 MONTHS BEFORE YOUR WEDDING DAY… 

YOUR GUESTS WILL WANT TO BOOK THEIR ACCOMMODATION AND TRANSPORT SO MAKE SURE THEY HAVE ENOUGH THEN TO DO THIS. YOU CAN LEAVE IT SLIGHTLY LATER IF YOU’VE SENT SAVE THE DATES IN ADVANCE! IF YOU HAVEN’T… THEN THE EARLIER YOU SEND THEM THE BETTER! YOUR VENUE WILL NEED TO KNOW YOUR FINAL NO.S AROUND 1 MONTH PRIOR TO YOUR WEDDING DATE SO MAKE SURE YOU GIVE YOURSELF ENOUGH TIME TO RECEIVE ALL YOUR RSVP’S BACK & COLLATE THEIR MENU CHOICES! BEAR IN MIND THAT THIS IS JUST A GUIDE AND WILL TOTALLY DEPEND ON HOW LONG YOUR PLANNING PROCESS IS… SOME PEOPLE BOOK 2 YEARS IN ADVANCE… SOME ONLY A COUPLE OF  MONTHS! If you saw my post today about Save-The-Dates you will know that I HIGHLY recommend you sending them… this gives people plenty of notice not to book holidays (or even their own wedding) over the top of your date… this will make it MUCH less stressful on you later down the line when it comes to sending invites as you know that everyone already has your date in their diary… so if you need a little bit more time to work on your invites (i.e. menu choices etc.) you have some time to delay them a bit! 

• Laura from Laura Jayne Designs says messaged me at this point saying ‘I actually find from working with lots of couples. The less time they give on RSVP’s too they get a better and quicker response without lots of chasing xx

This is 100% true… No matter how easy you make it for people to return their RSVP’s they will still need prompted and chased… and it’s always the ones you wouldn’t expect! For example… my Mum & Dad still haven’t responded to my Wedding which happened 2 years ago… because they assumed it was obvious they were coming! I was like… Ermmm, I still want the nice piece of paper back with the ‘will attend’ on though! 

Sending them closer to your Wedding will also save you from a lot of ‘false RSVP’s’… where people say yes very early then nearer the time their circumstances have changed and they can no longer attend, or vice versa, they couldn’t afford to come so said no, but have now managed to save the money and want to add on last minute! 

Also… people develop allergies and random dietary requirements left right and centre… I can’t tell you the amount of times that I had to change my catering plan with people suddenly becoming Vegan or Gluten Free last minute! 

Hence why I think Save-the-Dates are SO important and will give you the freedom to send your invites nearer to the actual day and save yourself a lot of extra bother! 

Q. Wanted to put menu choices in mine but with covid haven’t been able to go menu tasting

A. I’ve just seen that this was your next question! 

Hopefully you’ve sent your save the dates so not to worry! Invites can be sent out as late as 3 months prior if need be so don’t panic! I always recommend that my couples wait until after their Menu Tasting & ‘Run-Through’ appointment with me before sending their invites… and these meetings usually take place 6 months prior, so their invites are sent around 5 months out ish. 

As long as you have your invites ready to go, with your suspected menu choices on, then you will be able to get them printed  (or change them very quickly if you change your mind on your choices after your menu tasting) and sent the same day as your meeting! 

Q. Who do I take with me to shop for my dress?

A. ME ME ME!!! Pretty Pleaaaaaaaaase (I bloody LOVE Wedding Dress Shopping!) And apart from me… I would take:

– Your Mum

– Your MOH 

And that’s it!! 

I think it’s so easy to end up taking too many people with you and therefore there are too many opinions! Of course it’s totally up to you and if you want ALL of your Bridesmaids there, that’s great… it will definitely make a fun day out for you all! But before taking anyone else’s opinion to heart… just think to yourself… would me and this person wear the EXACT same dress… chance are… whilst something might look great on them… you have different body shapes and you probably wouldn’t like the style they would choose for themselves if it was put on you anyway! So don’t worry about them not loving it! Fair enough if they’re saying it doesn’t ‘suit you’… but if it’s not what they would choose… GOOD. All Brides are different! 

Take whoever you feel closest to and who’s opinion you would value… maybe it’s your most stylish friend, or even your Groom’s mum! Anyone who you know would tell you straight, but without being overly opinionated! Don;t invite people just because you feel you ‘should’. It’s YOUR dress… and you’re going to have a FAB time shopping for it! 

And let me know if you need any Bridal Shop recommendations! I know the girls who will look after you! 

Q. What do I do if one of my bridesmaids hates the dresses I’ve picked?

1. Okay so… if you’ve read my previous blogs then you’ll know my REAL opinion on this is ‘Tough Tits’… I think if the Bride asks you to wear a black bin bag… you wear it. However… my more understanding answer is: Ask for their opinion… is it something that you can do (i.e. the same colour but different style dress that they could wear?) Although it’s tempting to have a Bridezilla moment and tell them to buggar off (like I just did, haha)… you don’t want them looking uncomfortable, miserable and huffy on your wedding day… that will spoil your photos WAY more than a slightly different dress would… so it’s not the end of the world. But if they are being ridiculous then you have my permission to tell them exactly where to go! 

Q. Is it ok for the Bride to do a speech? 

1. 100% I LOVE when Brides do speeches… it’s 2021… to hell with tradition! Your Groom may feel nervous and not want to do a long one, and you may want to make sure that everyone has been thanked properly, especially all the people who helped YOU with the planning… or I’m sure you have lots of lovely things to say about him too! OF COURSE I did a speech on our Wedding Day… you’ll never shut me up… that’s for damn sure! But if it’s not for you… don’t worry! Again, it’s YOUR Wedding… whatever you want to do… do that! There are traditions but they’re not rules after all! 

– A message from one of my previous Brides: Hahaha I did a speech too! No way I spent a year organising a wedding and then not saying anything on the day!

Q. I’m really struggling with Wedding bands! So many questions… How much to budget? Where to go for bespoke? (My ring is an emerald cut cluster ring)? When to get organised etc!

1. Okay, there’s a little group of questions together here so I’ll work my way through them… First of all… Your ring is STUNNING! So with budgets for Wedding Rings obviously this is totally up to you… but to give you an idea of where to start, the average price of a diamond Wedding Ring in the UK is £1,120 (this would be for an average size like an M, with a 60% diamond band). Whereas a plain band of say 18k gold or platinum will range from around £320 to £760 depending on the thickness of the band. I can send you a link for a more detailed description on how wedding ring costing is affected – (if anyone else wants this just drop me a message and I’ll send it over for you!). I actually got very lucky with mine in that is was the very last one in the shop… which just so happened to be my size. Vera Wang was moving from Goldsmiths to Ernest Jones at the time so they were finishing the line and reduced the last few rings to hold price and somehow I managed to get the last one! This was sheer luck… as in, right place right time, nothing to do with me being in the Wedding Industry. Me & my MOH just happened to be browsing on the right day! So my advice would be to always look if you’re out shopping, you never know! 

For a bespoke ring, first of all I would start with the place that it was purchased from, and if they offer this kind of service. I know that Goldsmiths offer a bespoke service in certain stores… the one on Northumberland St. in Newcastle does (if you’re from my area!). Custom rings will be pricey-er than your average ring, but totally worth it for something that beautifully matches your engagement ring… bear in mind you will wear it EVERY DAY! People used to be wary of purchasing online… but I don’t think this is as much the case anymore… just me sure to triple check everything properly before you send any personal details like bank info out! 

Wednesday 17th February 2021 

Q. I would love a Champagne Tower! But the Fiance isn’t so keen. Does it actually work/is it more mess than it’s worth? And when would be good to do it during the day? During the drinks reception? 

1. So Champagne Towers… First of all: They are absolutely stunning! What a fabulous and interactive display piece to have at your Wedding! It’s definitely something that people will remember!! Secondly… yes they do totally work (as long as they are set up properly!). The first thing to do would be the check with your venue to see whether they would allow it… not all venues will or they may not know how to set it up properly… You would also need to ask them: 
   1. Whether they have the correct glassware… you’ll notice all images of champagne towers show ‘coupe’ glasses not the standard flutes that most venues will have… so you may need to hire/buy the glassware. 
   2. How much they charge per bottle… would they offer you a bulk price?… or would they allow you to bring your own champagne and just charge you a ‘corkage fee’. 
   3. Would there be any charge for breakages if it didn’t quite go according to plan? 

I would advise that your best bet may be to look into hiring a supplier to do all this for you… but I think it would definitely be worth it!!! These are just a few things to consider. Or… if you want the champagne but your Hubby-to-be is worried about it falling, why not have… A Champagne Wall! 

As for when… I would say do the champagne tower either: 

– As part of your Drinks Reception OR 

– As part of your Cake Cutting to start the Evening Reception off with some Glamour!

Q. What do you think about Blush Bridal Gowns? Would it be super unique or huge regret? 

1. ADOOOOOORE a Blush Dress!!! Such a statement… so Beautiful, and shows your personality… Always go with your heart… when you find ‘The One’… you’ll just know!! (Much like how you feel about your Hubby-to-be!) Don’t stress about the colour and what other people will think… if it feels right for you… go for it! 

Q. Helppp please… I’m confused over how many songs I need for the Ceremony. Is it 3? 

1. Of course I can help lovely! So, for Music… I actually have a full blog post on everything you need to know about Music for your day… It covers all the playlists you will need plus lots of tips to make sure that everything runs smoothly, that I have learned over the years (and trust me… I’ve learned the hard way!). You can find the blog post HERE. Check this out ESPECIALLY if you’re doing the music on a playlist yourself… there are so many little things to think about!! I’ll share some bits here for you now… For the Ceremony you will need: 

– Pre-Ceremony (About 30 mins worth of music for your guests to be seated / whilst they wait for you to arrive)

– Processional (1 Song for your to walk down the aisle to)

– Signing the Register (3 / 4 Songs to be played as background music whilst you sign). 

– Recessional (Your Exit Song – as you walk back up the aisle with your New Hubby!) 

Q. How do you deal with guests who make it all about them? 

1. Honestly I swear… Wedding Planning is easy… until you start inviting people! Okay, so I probably need a little bit more context in order to help you more with this one… (feel free to send me a DM anytime… I’m always happy to listen if you need to let off some steam and have a little bitch about them!) But speaking in general… I would say either: 

– Disinvite them to the Wedding (Yes seriously… if anyone is spoiling this for you, you have the right to take charge and tell them NO. Positive vibes only! B&G’s have been through enough this year!

– Sit them on the furthest table away from you (Like in the corner next to the toilets… serves the right… bye hun! 

– Tell them (In all seriousness, just talk to them… it’s the best way to solve anything… they may not even realise how difficult they’re being. Pull them to onside and tell them that this is hard enough and you would appreciate their support. 

– Set your Wedding Planner on them (Failing all that… point them out to me on the day… I’ve got you!) 

Wednesday 24th February 2021

Q. Did you find it difficult planning a wedding abroad compared to the UK

1. I absolutely LOVED my destination wedding but I have to say… For anyone thinking of doing it… it is HUGELY different planning a wedding abroad compared to one at home! Here are just a few things that you may not have considered when thinking about a destination wedding: 

• So for starters… you will most likely need to travel out there more than once
  • We flew out first of all to choose a venue and meet with some local wedding planners
  • We then had to fly out again because (not many people know this) our venue got sold and closed down… we were absolutely heartbroken.
  • And then again to meet with our suppliers, have make-up/hair trials, menu & cake tastings etc. 
• So you need to make sure to factor this into your budget from your start! (inc. flights, hotels and meals!). 

(I promise you I can really understand how it feels when things go wrong in your planning process!) I’ll see if I can find some pics of our original venue to show you all. 

This was our original venue. We always referred to it as ‘Our Lighthouse’… we were devastated when we got the news the venue had closed… after we’d just sent the deposit to book. But everything happens for a reason, and we ended up loving our new venue even more! (Not gonna lie… I was pretty inconsolable for a while though… you just have to have a little faith!). 

Other things to consider: 

• We actually ended up driving over to Portugal because we had so much Wedding ‘stuff’ to take with us! (This may just be a ‘me’ problem as I have no idea how to pack light! – but please remember to consider additional luggage!) 
• Please also look into local laws… things may be slightly different in the country you’ve chosen! For example: … Because we were getting married on a cliff (Yes an actual cliff!)… we had to pay for the police to attend our wedding… I’m still not fully sure to this day exactly why… but I know they came and checked our marriage license, passports and then acted as bouncers during the ceremony to keep the public away from us while we said our vows… totally random and something you would never even think to consider!!! (And the weren’t cheap!) 

Saying all of that… I would 1000% recommend a destination wedding! We had the absolute BEST time… 

• It was a full 2 week holiday with all of our guests. 
• We organised so many additional events with everyone wile we were there; swimming in the ocean, visiting local attractions and eating out at amazing restaurant. 
• We had a ‘welcome’ party at our villa for everyone arriving in Portugal and also a ‘Hangover Pool Party’ the day after the Wedding! 

What more could you ask for! 

We definitely did it a more difficult way than necessary, as we booked everything separately (I wouldn’t recommend doing this unless you have planning experience… it was a lot of additional work and stress, but I wanted to have everything a certain way!) 

If you want to do it this was then DEFINITELY book a Wedding Planner over there!… (being a planner myself I knew it was one of the most important things to get booked straight away!) Not only will they have knowledge of the area and local suppliers but their fees also included translation of all documents and emails (which would actually end up costing you more to do separately! – trust me… I checked!) 

The easiest way would be to book everything through a travel agent and have them organise everything for you!! 

So to answer your questions: YES… definitely harder! & YES… totally worth the extra stress! 

Q. Not a questions… BUT I MISS WEDDINGS!!!!! 

1. Omg… SAME SAME SAME! But there is FINALLY light at the end of the tunnel! (Missing all my B&G’s so much!) 

Q. 5 Bridesmaids – Only 2 really know one another. Any ideas to bring them together to get to know each other? X 

1. Oooh! Yes, definitely!! Gotta get all your Girlies together!! 
   • How about a DIY session? (Love these) A full girls night where you bond over Wedding planning… for example, if you’ve got any invites that need wax sealed, or confetti cones to stuff, favours to label etc. ask the all over to give you a hand… you’ll probs ruin your manicures but you’ll all be besties but the end of it! 
   • What about a Sparkling Afternoon Tea? – I’m sure they’ll be loads of Vouchers on Groupon when everything reopens!… 
   • I’ve been to a Cocktail making class with some Bridesmaids before – that was a really good laugh!
   • And some LUSH Spa Days too!! Nice and relaxing and you can chat about your Wedding all day! 
   • Or there; the obvious… dress shopping (both Bridal & Bridesmaid!) Also shoes & jewellery too! 
   • Remember… they’ll also probably get together to do some Hen Party Planning for you… you could make a Group Chat to start them off (and then just leave it to make sure you don’t spoil any surprises for yourself!) Good Luck! 

Q. How should I deal with people (my sister) being constantly negative about my wedding? 

1. Ahh no!! That must be so hard for you… having someone so close to you tarnishing your happy moments! There is absolutely NO room for negativity of any kind this year… I think we’ve all had enough and are ready to celebrate!! So I’ve spoken on the topic of difficult guests before, and I think a lot of you will know my thoughts on the subject. 
   • First of all, I think that people sometimes need a reminder that thus us YOUR day… you only get to do it once! (In theory). And it’s not just the day but the FULL planning process that you should be allowed to enjoy to the max! My No. 1 place would always be to talk it out with them… they may not realise how much of an impact their negativity is having on you. It’s definitely a difficult and awkward convo to have…. But it will save more aggravation later down the line! 
   • Failing that: Could you ask someone else to speak to her? Maybe your parents or someone out of your Bridal Party? 
   • Kill them with kindness!!! (Keep thinking positive thoughts about your Wedding and don’t let them affect how you think about it AT ALL! If they’re intent on upsetting you… it will drive them absolutely insane to see that it’s having no affect at all. Bask in the excitement of your wedding and smile in the face of adversity… it will piss them right off! 
   • Or disinvite them to your Wedding… (I know it’s your sister so this is probably not possible in this circumstance… but it honestly doesn’t matter who they are… if they are REALLY spoiling your Wedding in any way, they don’t deserve to be there on the day! 
   • And if that doesn’t work… as I’ve said before… Set your Wedding Planning on them (I’ve got you!)

Q. Do I just let my Fiancé choose his and the Groomsmen’s suits or should I face a say? 

1. You should DEFINITELY have a say!! My Husband actually chose his own suit (and the Groomsmen’s too)… and ge did a FAB job – if he does say so himself! But yes… sorry boys… but I defo think you need supervision! I would say… let them take the lead and show you what they like and feel comfortable in… and then guide them to make sure that everything ties in with the overall colour scheme and aesthetic of your Wedding! (Especially little things like ties and pocket squares etc.) I think most lads would definitely feel more at ease if you were there to help/guide them… as I don’t think they would want the full responsibility of a big decision like that, in case they got it wrong. Mr T is definitely SURE about his decisions and knows what he wants… but he would tell you himself that the Brides opinion is the final and most important one at the end of the day! 

Q. When are you free for Brunch in May Hun? 

A. EVERY.SINGLE.DAY! 

Annnnd that’s all folks! Everything that we sipped and shared about during the month of February!

I always save these to my instagram Story Highlights so you can also find them there, or if the question you wanted answers to hasn’t yet been asked, come and join me and some other Bridal Babes for the next ‘Wine & Whine’ Wedding Wednesday!

I look forward to seeing you there!

Lots of Love,

Mrs T x